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BROKEN NEWS

Despite the impressive lineage of reporters that have walked the halls of the Hendrix Student Center since the early 1900s, The Tiger will close its doors and print its last issue in the coming weeks.

Propaganda

Recently, students have taken note of the paint cans which appeared on the fifth floor of Cooper Library before spring break. It’s been revealed that the University has plans to repaint Cooper Library in a coat of Clemson orange on its interior and exterior. All the books will be bound in or…

After years of serving hardly edible foods to students, the Schilletter Dining Hall of West Campus is about to reinvent itself. The University has decided to dump an exorbitant amount of money into the dining hall, more commonly known as “shitter” amongst students. You can say goodbye to mea…

On Tuesday, Clemson students received a ‘Spring Update’ email from President Jim Clements detailing several University events, as well as a surprise announcement. In order to combat the growing limitation of parking spaces around campus, Clements has announced that he is becoming a certified…

Balls

After head coach Dabo Swinney compared freshman quarterback Cade Klubnik to a German Shepherd in a press release in early March, Clemson Athletics has moved forward with adding a dog show to the spring football game on March 9.“I mean, he’s like a German Shepard,” Swinney said of Klubnik on …

The Clemson University Board of Trustees Finance and Facilities Committee has partnered with Meta to approve a $17.5 million plan to build a state-of-the-art virtual training facility for the University’s esports team.

In a stunning move, Deshaun Watson has announced his return to Death Valley for the 2022 season.After failing to win a Super Bowl with the Houston Texans, Watson has his sights set on a second National Championship at the collegiate level.“I’m trying to, of course, be legendary,” Watson said…

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TitsOut

A recent update to the athletic contract required for football players has misspelled “Clemson players” to “The Clemson Players,” resulting in the team becoming contractually obligated to perform in the University theatre department’s spring musical.As both new and returning players signed t…

A 50% pledge to IPTAY is all that’s required to access Clemson’s new streaming service, Clemson+! With the launch, IPTAY, originally “I Pay Ten A Year,” has rebranded as “I Pay Tons A Year” to better advertise the requirements of the organization.The official Clemson+ website describes the p…

Although the Russo-Ukrainian war is taking place thousands of miles from Clemson University, the campus is feeling the effects of gas price increases along with the rest of the world.

Inside Her

Recently, Clemson Dining announced their plans to open a full bar in Schilletter dining hall, expected to be completed following construction in 2023. With plans to expand Schillatter into Hendrix, it’s not the craziest addition to be made.

Imagine this: it’s a beautiful, Clemson morning. You wake up at your friend’s place after a long night of bible study. After walking outside to retrieve your car, you find that Death Valley Towing has hooked you up for a free trip to the local tow yard.

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